I've been waiting for the perfect words but they never came. So imperfect words and a few resources must do.

(For a summery on all this AND the reason why body positivity is DEFINITELY political, read this)

If we were to take a look at The Militant Baker Facebook and Google demographic numbers, the vast majority of you are US women who are both white and plus size. White, plus women in the US- we are similar in many ways, you and I. And I'm glad you're here because we have some work to do.

It's essential to recognize that as women, our bodies are systematically regulated, ridiculed, and assaulted. As fat women, we experience this on a whole other level (read this amazing article about supporting fat women in the time of Trump). This is real, horrifying and not to be dismissed or diminished. But in addition to taking care of ourselves and our safety, it's important that we act now to eradicate discrimination against all other bodies as well. You and me? It's likely that we live in similar bodies and lead similar lives... and we can do more. 

Now is not the time for silence. Now is not the time for lukewarm advocacy. Now is not the time for "Let's wait and see." Now is the time to act intentionally, fiercely and with commitment. 

Marginalized folx have been saying this forever, but we weren't listening hard enough. I wasn't listening hard enough. None of us were listening to the extent that we needed to be.


I've spent the last few weeks reading, listening, processing, sobbing, drinking wine, reading, listening and processing some more. I wanted to find the best way for me to get my shit together and do better.

Here is what I have come up with for me personally and some of these action items may work for you:

  1.  I will continue to share articles and resources on my social media pages. 

    Not just about sizes and shapes (though I'll post/write about that too because: important + lived experience), but about all discrimination so that hatred does not become normalized. The social media pages will not be forums to discuss why hateful things are/are not hateful, but rather a feed of information and place to amplify brilliant marginalized voices. I invite you to stay, read, think and work on improving. We can all improve. It's what I'm here for too.

  2. I will organize with the community here in Tucson.

    I have the privilege of being able to reach hundreds of thousands of people online, but it's not enough. Even though millions (and individuals who could reach millions) shared information far and wide on social media leading up to Nov 8th... we still find ourselves here. It didn't do what we needed it to do. So lets do more and lets do it in person.

    With the ever increasing fear of First Amendment rights being infringed upon, having physical feet on the ground is crucial. I will be working with a local post-election organizing group on a variety of issues, and I would encourage you to find one near you. Another established group that is highly recommended is Showing Up for Racial Justice (SURJ) and they have chapters all over the country. There's a good chance that there is one near you.
  3. I will physically interrupt moments of harassment and violence. 

    I certainly understand the kind intent behind the wearing of a safety pin, but this article beautifully explains why a pin just isn't enough.

    Interrupting harassment and violence can be really scary if you are unprepared (hell, it's scary even when you're prepared) but it's important so let me share some resources with you. Here's a short and sweet "Bystanders Guide to Harassment" and "5 Ways to Disrupt Racism" in video format. I've received feedback from dozens of people who use these approches often and they say it works and works well.

    I also worry (even more than before) about law force accountability in the future so I'm thankful for the Google Doc called "What To Do Instead of Calling the Police"... familiarize yourself with it. If you witness law enforcement violence, here is what to do if they tell you to stop filming them and it's important to know your rights- this article from the ACLU is great for that.
  4. I will have hard conversations with those who are in my offline life, and I will have them with empathy. 

    This will always be the most challenging commitment I can make. I am full of rage, anger and sadness. I don't really "feel" like having a kind conversation with someone who actively makes decisions that harm other people. But the least effective choice we can make is to turn our back on everyone else and refuse to have hard conversations with those who know us well.

    This article is probably my favorite thing I've read to date and says:
    Use the advantage of your personal relationship. People can easily dismiss those they don’t know, but they know and trust you. It won’t be as easy to dismiss your experience when you are leveling with them person to person. 
    Use empathy. This is the part where it gets sticky. White supremacy is so ingrained in American culture that in order to dismantle it, we need you. You’re our anti-racist Serpico. Ask about the troubles they are having in their own lives and relate it to everyone wanting the same things. Discussions about race and white supremacy can make anyone hunker down and get defensive, so in order to keep your sanity, use empathetic approaches.

    It's both incredible and wonderful that multiple resources have been made for us to help get through those difficult conversations. Here's an outline called "How to talk to your loved ones about a Donald Trump presidency" and another resource form SURJ called the "Thanksgiving Toolkit: Bringing Justice Home." Even though some resources may be holiday specific, they can help in all sorts of situations. Use 'em.

This is by no means an exhaustive list. There is also a long list of other ways to help, posted on Medium by Lindy West that I highly suggest reading among other resources on the web. If you also struggle with mental illness and are wondering how to balance helping the cause when you are also needing help, read this. There is always more we can do. There is more we must do.

I worry that my words are not strong enough to explain exactly what is happening in our country right now and how critical it is that we fight and fight hard. I also worry they might be too strong and will drive those who can help in social liberation away. But these are the only words I have. So here they are.

Tl;dr? Well then here's a summary: Please, please be "that fat girl"... this world needs you. And I'm with you all the way.


(Note: This is part two of an article written about body positivity, how to step up and why it's necessary. While they're easiest to read separately, both are important so check out the first part here!)

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