You don't have to look very hard to find vicious things on the internet.
I was researching a cheeky concept for this blog post series when I stumbled upon mountains and mountains of posts by asshats giving their hateful opinion on what fat people should not be allowed to do. This somehow resulted in me, the self love queen, spending the better part of the morning crying in the bathroom at work, texting my boyfriend that he deserved better, and silently apologizing to every person that I was fat through my eyes. I was deeply ashamed on such a profound level that it kind of frightened me. I wrote on Amy’s blog about how self love is always a journey and the goal is to have more good days than bad days. This day was a. BAD. Day.
It took a while to remove myself from that destructive state of mind. After I did, sad was the furthest thing from my mind. I was fucking outraged.
How DARE someone make me ashamed of my body. How DARE someone reduce me to the size of my dress. How DARE they dismiss things I say about healthy living because I weigh more than them. How DARE they tell me that I’m lazy and have no self control. How dare they make me ashamed to feel sexy. How dare they. How FUCKING DARE they.
How DARE someone make me ashamed of my body. How DARE someone reduce me to the size of my dress. How DARE they dismiss things I say about healthy living because I weigh more than them. How DARE they tell me that I’m lazy and have no self control. How dare they make me ashamed to feel sexy. How dare they. How FUCKING DARE they.
In our society today, fat discrimination is not only accepted, but encouraged. Fat people shouldn't complain about this, because if they would just lose weight then it would go away. Case in point. I think it is all too easy to forget about size discrimination. This particular issue of Sizeism, though we do talk about it, isn't talked about enough. We like to focus on the positive, of course. How to love ourselves, why we are awesome, "be you and be fabulous!" we cheer. But on the flip side there is an ugly, ugly world that needs to be actively challenged. I have to question if we ever stop to contemplate the depth and horror of fat discrimination. Health care is denied, jobs are retracted, jokes ruin self esteem, food service is shitty, and hate crimes ARE committed. This and more. Much much more. All of this out of fear of a body shape. This is beyond unacceptable.
After processing these thoughts the unjustifiable disgust from the posts and forums strengthened my resolve to like myself. And not only like myself, but love my body, and tell anyone who says otherwise to fuck off. The best way to combat the idea that my "existence should be punished" is to be a contradictory and visibly successful and happy person who revels in my own awesomeness. This is why I am starting a new series of posts entitled:
“25 Things Fat People Shouldn't Do”
25 Things Fat People Shouldn't Do is an unabashed middle finger to the preposterous idea that any human who weighs more than the status quo does not deserve to live a full and well rounded (ahem) life. The list of 25 is composed word for word from direct lists of sheer assholery found on the internet. These range from the absurd to the profoundly shameful, and I will be disproving this offensive notion with style. Feel free to join in on the fun, and if you do, email me a link so I can share. May the Chub Club live long and prosper!
And to the rude morons who say I shouldn't, I say:
watch me motherfuckers. Watch me real good.
Some of the things on the list seem so bizarre to me. What the heck is wrong with wearing a shirt with glitter?! I do believe I'll be joining in from time to time.
ReplyDeleteYAY! OHMYGOD SO AWESOME. Can't wait to see 'em.
DeleteLists like those always confuse (and enrage) me, mostly because I have no idea what the lists are predicated on. "25 things fat people shouldn't do because it grosses me out"? "25 things fat people should do because it's dangerous"? And once that information is disclosed for every set of reasons "why fat people shouldn't do xyz" there is a basic argument totally invalidating their premise: "because it grosses me out"? Don't look at it. "because it's dangerous"? I guarantee there will be overlap with non-fat people. Your argument against this nonsense is invalid and I am now dumber for having read you, listmaker.
ReplyDeleteAnd while we're at it what's the benchmark for fat? 167 pounds? 273? 400? Is their benchmark the same as mine, do we have to go with what size the alleged fat person describes themselves as?
SO MANY QUESTIONS.
In summation: these lists are some bullshit. And good on you for calling them out. Also I am going to objectify you a little bit and I'm sorry, but you've got some kickin' curves so we're going to see pictures of you in this bikini right? ;)
Bikini pictures I actually have... so there will be a r-eposting and also a swimsuit edition:) Totally flattered.
DeleteI'm always relieved when my lecherousness is taken well. :D
DeleteI was reading an outdoorsy magazine called Outside, and I was horrified to read an opinion article about enforcing fat tax/skinny rebate to force people to live healthier. I was like seriously, WTF?!?! I am so horrified by how shallow and plain MEAN humanity can be sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI heard about that too. So so so so SO fucked. PUNISH THE FATTIES!!! YEAH!!!!
DeleteI'm 6'0 and 150 pounds, which I know isn't like fat, but I always see stuff in magazines about celebrities "ballooning" to 140 pounds or whatever (which I appreciate if they're shorter might be a bigger deal to them) and hearing shorter friends moan about weighing "so much" when I know they weigh less than I do, which I get really upset by personally. I think 'cause of this, I have a very small level of understanding about this sort of thing, though I know I obviously have thin privilege cause no-one's making lists with me in mind about things I shouldn't be allowed to do for example. That list is disgusting, fuck anyone that thinks they can dictate what you do. Hopefully one day we'll be past all this bullshit, and the world will be a better place for all women. In the meantime, good on you for calling it out and I hope you enjoy shimmying in your bikini and eating in public and everything else that you have every fucking right to do. Fuck the haters, solidarity xxxxxx
ReplyDeleteCharlotte, first and foremost, you are SO lovely. Really, just gorgeous. Okay, now that thats out of the way... right!?!? Self depreciation is rewarded in life. Its so fucked. Its really hard to keep yourself boosted when other people won't do the same.
DeleteAlso, I think everyone goes through this on different level. You get excluded if you have blonde hair, red hair, brown hair, no hair, too much boob, not enough boob, disproportionate hips, no hips, long torso, short torso, small nose, large nose... I mean... everything. We are taught to aspire to an ideal that literally doesn't exist and so we spend every day trying and then hate ourselves when we fail. This is so cruel:( We need a revolution!
This is just stupid.
ReplyDeleteThere in France, a nutritionist suggest that you can have more points for graduation (in school) if you have a good weight...
So stupid !
I know! The hate isn't limited to America:( Here they have done studies that show that obese children are poor students... without looking at the psychological side... like... if a child is over eating is it because they're depressed? Because they have problems at home? Because they don't have self esteem? Any one of those could also be linked to poor grades, but no one goes there.
DeleteSTUPID! Agreed.
Amen, Jes! And maybe that kid has poor grades because they are being bullied at school for their body shape. Maybe they are staying home sick and missing school work because they don't want to go to school and be tormented.The problem isn't with the kid or their weight, it's with the system.
DeleteI do believe "be straight" is my favorite from the list. That gem is just too precious to even touch. I mean, really?
ReplyDeleteI laughed too:) Being bi was on there as well... so I guess fat people can only be gay? No words, my friend. No words.
DeleteThis is just a fabulous list! Your awesomeness and willingness to say "screw that!!" never ceases to amaze and inspire me.
ReplyDeleteI MADE MY OWN WOMANIFESTO!!! =)
ReplyDeleteIt'll post on Monday, but I'd love if you checked it out once it did! <3
Xoxo, Sarah
I'm a size 16 woman who runs, wears a bikini, eats in public (actually at a booth today, two things in one!), and do a number of those other things too. This list is ridiculous. I look forward to following you as you write about it!
ReplyDeleteI try not to pay the internet any mind. On one hand it's just a place for a bunch of miserable people to bash others, but it's also a place for awesome voices like yours to be exhibited and discovered. I'm glad you've decided to do this project. I look forward to seeing the photographs and hearing about your experiences.
ReplyDelete-Jess
http://www.wearegypsies.blogspot.com
I just found this list of yours, but I already know I want to play along and do some of these myself and post about it too!
ReplyDeleteHOLY SHIT! I just found your blog and I effin' love you! I am eating it up ... (ha) ... seriously, in no order, just jumping from post to post! I can't get enough!
ReplyDeleteHECK YES, I love a good woman with a good blog!
(oh, and of course, thank you for this honest and enlightened post. Preach, lady, PREACH!)
@ Jes - I just found your blog & I'm loving it! You have spoken my mind so many times & I've only read a few posts. Keep it up lady! :o)
ReplyDelete@ Alice - That's just crazy... so it's ok for kids to be unintelligent... just not fat. Psychotic.
I have to say, I was definitely one of the most curvaceous girls in my high school class, but yet I graduated at the top of my class. Go figure. Hips, boobs, belly, butt & brains. All in one package. LOL
Though I may not be fat, I some days have horrible self-image and self-esteem. I was chubby all of my life and it's not fun when people laugh at you for not fitting in those jeans. So I applaud you for the middle finger you're giving these mother-effers. Everyone should be happy with and proud of who they are.
ReplyDeleteHi Jes, I just started blogging again and when I was browsing through the internet for some inspiration, I found your blog...I just had an embarrassing moment last week, when 2 french guys at an event I was hosting made a comment about me, "oh she seems fun but i think she's just too fat" and I heard it --- I feel like reading your blog is a blessing and a reminder that wearing my body as a statement to a much bigger revolution is an awesome thing. I am so happy that there are a lot of big women all over the world rallying to eliminate the terrible mindset about size. I know I'm late but I will definitely join in to show that there are a lot of things we can do! Keep inspiring, from a plump Asian girl sticking like a sore thumb in my country lol
ReplyDelete