THINGS NO ONE WILL TELL FAT GIRLS: THE G-RATED VERSION

(Via Unshelved)

I've wanted to write a post that offered a "censored" version of my book Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls for a long time. After all, the #1 complaint I've heard from people is that there is "Too much f*cking swearing! Your mouth is filthy!" Somewhere in the universe while this is being said, pearls are being clutched really tightly. Occasionally this is followed with "I'm upset that I can't read it to my mother or teenager."

And while my grandmother loves it (and most teenagers I know  have a more extensive curse word vocab than I do) I thought long and hard about how to make TNOWTFG more... palatable.

I threw around cheeky ideas of how to present it- blacking out every word on a two page spread except for the words "love yourself." Or maybe writing a post composed of only three sentences: "Media is silly. Use critical thinking. You can love your body if you want to" and then just calling it a day.

But I no longer have to scheme about a silly way to censor my book because Unshelved did it for me and they actually did a really great job

(Though I'm unsure if this image is actually G rated because there's a person in a bikini and in my world bodies aren't vulgar so I'm not the right person for rating things... but let's just say it's Disney Cartoon Movie appropriate so it's probably safe to let your kids see. PHEW!)

The highlights of TNOWTFG without any effing swear words: 

  • Thin is not the same thing as healthy: What we believe about health and fat bodies is often inaccurate. Here. Let me blow your mind: Skinny bodies can be unhealthy. Fat bodies can be unhealthy. Skinny bodies can be healthy. And fat bodies can be healthy. What does this mean? It means we must remove weight from the health equation. Period. That leaves us to look at the other signifiers of health.
  • You don't have to put your life on hold until you lose weight: We wait and wait and wait to do the things we love because we believe our body is holding us back. No more.
  • You deserve good health care without judgement: Often society blames fat people's health problems on the simple fact that they are fat. This, as we've established is not necessarily the case. We have to look deeper than size and realize that one of the many reasons we come across complications with fat bodies (besides the detrimental effects of dieting) has to do with the fact that being fat and going to the doctor is a traumatizing event. It's been proven that doctors (and especially nurses) are just as emotionally biased as everyone else and often treat plus bodies with a deplorable amount of loathing. There is example after example of fat people going to the doctor for problems completely unrelated to size and the first piece of advice they receive is "You need to lose weight." Others have gone in for checkups and hear "You're perfectly healthy but you should probably go on a diet." Understandably, fat patients then dread going into a medical environment so they don't... and then unrelated conditions worsen. Not because they're fat. But because they are treated like sub-humans. This treatment must change.
  • Happiness is not a size: I am fattest that I have ever been and I am also the happiest I have ever been and this simply proves that happiness is not a size. Happiness is a state of being. Happiness is about finding what you love about yourself and sharing it. Happiness is about taking what you hate about yourself and learning to love it. Happiness is an internal sanctuary where you are enough just as you are, right now.
  • You can do any sport you want: Fat bodies can absolutely be athletes if they want to (check out Louise Green's Limitless concept!) but I want to be clear that they also don't need to engage in any exercise regimen in their search of being a worthy human. BODY AUTONOMY FOREVER.
  • Get angry at the lack of representation in the media: Even if we're conscious of how media affects our perception of the world, I don't know if we really truly understand how much of the subconscious (and sometimes blatant) messaging stays in our core forever. Luckily the internet has allowed every person to contribute to the visuals floating around our universe and sharing selfies is a great way to start!
  • You can wear sexy clothes: OF COURSE YOU CAN. Fashion rules are for people who haven't figured out that you can wear whatever you want. Which is a fact.
  • You can find love: All kinds of love. Puppy love. Community love. Coffee Date love. Lover love. Mushy "I love you forever just as you are" love. Fat people find these types of love all the time... we just don't see it represented anywhere. But that doesn't mean it doesn't exist!
  • Salad doesn't send you to heaven and cheesecake doesn't send you to hell: Assigning moral value to food is bulls... uhm, RIDICULOUS. Sorry, it was hard to censor that one. Because it's really that. You're not a good person for eating carrots and you're not a bad person for eating cake. End of story.
  • You can love your body: I know you don't feel like you fit into the category of gorgeous that our world creates. I know that it's hard. I know that it’s a daily battle. But f*** their fascist beauty standards. The second you stop looking for a thin model in your mirror and start looking at YOU... is the second you will start to appreciate what you are. Stop looking for flaws. Stop looking for differences. You are perfect. You are more than enough. You are the best thing that has ever happened to you. And you are beautiful. You got this.

So there you go! A simple and free summary of Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls, which is totally appropriate for ears- sensitive or not! You can find all the research for these statements online and of course in my book.

Thanks Unshelved for the gorgeous image. I'm honored, grateful and super impressed <3

P.S. My writing isn't for and never will be for children, BUT I've compiled an amazing list of 20 diverse and body positive kids books that you'll probably love!

P.P.S. If you're cool with swearing and like bad-ass thought provoking body image convos, 1.) We're obviously BFFs already and 2.) You'll probably love my book and can get it here.

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