DEAR JES, WHY YOU SO SUPERFICIAL?

'Scuze me while I get all vain for a sec. 

People often ask me why I place so much focus on the body.

Why you so superficial Jes'ca?!? Why isn't the focus on our inner beauty? Why aren't we talking about what we contribute to the world? Why aren’t we mentioning how marvelous our soul is?

I've thought long and hard about this question, and I've come to a personal conclusion. It goes something like this: we are more likely to be told by the world that we are good people than anything else. Funny, creative, intelligent, communicative, generous, maybe even extraordinary. What we are NOT told is that our bodies are beautiful just the way they are. We are taught that our figure is flawed, and not only is it flawed, but that the majority of our worth lies within our physical appearance. Which, of course is never “perfect enough” by societies standards. This affects our lives on a monumental level.

We become too embarrassed to meet up with the friend we haven't seen in years because we might have gained weight. We sabotage relationships through thinking that we're unworthy of physical affection. We hide our face when we have breakouts. We opt out of the dance class because we're worried we'll look ridiculous while participating. We miss out on sex positions because we're afraid we'll crush our partner with our perceived weight if we are on top. We don't approach potential friends because we assume they will judge our appearance before anything else. We shirk when walking in public spaces; trying to take up as little room as possible. We build our lives around the belief that we are undeserving of attention, love, and amazing opportunities when this couldn't be further from the truth.

Our bodies are installation art that we curate publicly. Our bodies are the first message those around us receive. Our bodies are our personal bookmarks in the world. Our bodies are magnificent houses for everything else that we are.  Our bodies are a part of us, just like our kindness, talents, and passion. Yes, we are so much more than our outer shell, but our outer shell is an integral part of our being too. This is why I focus on them! The way we view our bodies impacts the way we participate in the world... and wouldn't it be wonderful if we loved and accepted them for the perfect things that they are?

But it's easier said than done, amiright or amiright?

Do you see changes in your peripheral life as you learn to love your body a little more? Where else to you see positive changes? What are other reasons you feel it's important to love your body as well as the rest of you?

I'm curious. Educate me.

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